Gregory Freeman: A Look Ahead; Predictions Are Easy To Make, Harder To Forget. P-D 1/1/1998t

Headline: A LOOK AHEAD\ PREDICTIONS ARE EASY TO MAKE, HARDER TO FORGET
Reporter: By Gregory Freeman

Publication: ST. LOUIS POST-DISPATCH
Last Printed: Thu., Jan. 1, 1998
Section: METRO, Page: C1, Edition: FIVE STAR LIFT

It's 1998, and this year's got me worried.

You'd be worried too if you knew the world was going to come to an end.
Or that those who died on the battlefield of Gettysburg 135 years ago would come back to life this year as we watch on TV.
Or that meteors would fall to the Earth this year with increasing frequency, pounding the Statue of Liberty to rubble.

I know these things not because I have a crystal ball or anything close to one. Instead, I pay attention to what the psychics are saying, and these are some of their predictions for this year.
Those folks have abilities far beyond yours or mine. They consult the stars, check the charts and are able to predict what is going to happen. In fact, according to one of the tabloids, Nostradamus predicted 500 years ago that we'll see a worldwide credit card this year, "which the poor people of this Earth will not be able to afford."
I listen to what the psychics have to say. After all, the late Jeane Dixon once predicted President John F. Kennedy's assassination, and he was killed 35 years ago. So maybe these folks are onto something.

Now, I've got to admit that they weren't so good in making predictions for 1997. I waited until the last minute Wednesday before concluding that the predictions for that year weren't going to come true.

Tammy Faye Baker was not appointed ambassador to Israel. I waited until midnight, thinking that President Bill Clinton might make a last-minute appointment, but it didn't happen.
I was sure that the Republican Congress would establish the $1,000 tax deduction for each taxpayer who killed a career criminal, but the politicians failed us on that front.
Even Madonna declined to be part of the predictions, choosing not to run for the U.S. Senate.
I knew for sure that hair brushing and rubbing heads would replace kissing in 1997 because of the spread of AIDS through saliva, but the trend didn't take hold.
Maybe scientists somewhere developed a new computer to allow us to talk to our dogs, but I never heard of it.
Neither did I hear of the discovery by plastic surgeons of a way to give dogs the faces of movie stars.

Unfortunately, the psychics weren't that good in making predictions for 1996, either.

After all, former Good Morning America host Joan Lunden d idn't become engaged to Shaquille O'Neal.
And although he has a show on cable television, Johnnie Cochran still isn't being hailed as the "new Bill Cosby" by playing a defense attorney in a new situation comedy. Not only that, but Cochran's client, O.J. Simpson, never joined a monastery.
Even the psychics weren't able to help television soap opera actress Susan Lucci, who was supposed to finally win an Emmy but break her toe when she dropped it on her foot.
Many waited breathlessly for the Republicans to put together a Rush Limbaugh-Sonny Bono ticket to challenge Bill Clinton and Al Gore, but it never materialized. Perhaps it would have been more successful than the Bob Dole-Jack Kemp ticket.
Not only was Limbaugh not nominated, he didn't give up his radio career to star in a remake of the show "Jake and the Fat Man."
And, speaking of show business, comedian Jim Carrey neither won an Oscar nor suffered from his face freezing in a twisted expression.
Finally, in 1996, the South Pacific island of Tonga neither landed nor stranded people on the moon, so the United States didn't have to ride to the rescue.

OK, so the psychics haven't always been right.
Jeane Dixon was unable to predict her death last year.
And Dionne Warwick's psychic friends didn't predict the death of her singing career years ago.
Still, I predict that I'll be hanging around my TV set a lot this year. I don't want to miss that Gettysburg resurrection.

My only other prediction for this year is this: Your check will still be in the mail.

Daniel Schesch - Webweaver

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